rainy days and humdrums
leading a humdrum existence... yes yes its true im suffering from spiritual lethargy. i dont see the point in going to church no more. for his glory many say, but whose? for someone tt i cant see or even feel no more. i know that he is beside me and always waiting for me to embrace him once again, its just, too painful to tread upon. too painful to speak of.
Go to church? for what i ask. its become a routine, step in step out. i just find that the way unnecessary pressure that is placed upon believers is not entirely necessary. like going for corporate prayer... it has become a case of, if i dont go then it'll be unfair to the rest of the people going. Frankly i've never really thought about it that way until e leaders said tt. it just seems like church is a propaganda machine that spews out gospel after gospel to their people, some of which who blindly follow and in turn would become spirit filled zombies.
do not break the prayer chain or else u know it is unfair to so and so.
come for this and this event, i mean imagine all your cell mates that would come too.
its always a case of dont do this and so and so may happen to you. its as if its a threat, or a way of making you feel bad. i know that all they are trying to inculcate is a sense of responsibility but it just does not work with me. i just feel so much more Free without all these "chains" attached. isnt being a christian freeing yourself from the chains of sin in the first place? why do i feel the other way round?
From fearing God im now afraid of him. what is this i say.... one thing for sure my mom does not support my stand and does not understand where i coming from. "oh im open to new things" yea right.... what a traditionalist i say. just because im not really for bush and she going "your not a christian!" like wth... and just by saying the word "infidel" she gets so hyped up about it and how it is such a taboo word used by the satanists or some ocult group. She will never accept the fact that there is such a thing as spiritual lethargy, by theory of - God stengthenth me. Ya ok mom i get it... but following something blindly is not him stengthening you, its masking yourself from him. spirited zombie i tell you... following his word blindly. And i dont want to become a spirited zombie, tho im a zombie myself without him.
Go to church? for what i ask. its become a routine, step in step out. i just find that the way unnecessary pressure that is placed upon believers is not entirely necessary. like going for corporate prayer... it has become a case of, if i dont go then it'll be unfair to the rest of the people going. Frankly i've never really thought about it that way until e leaders said tt. it just seems like church is a propaganda machine that spews out gospel after gospel to their people, some of which who blindly follow and in turn would become spirit filled zombies.
do not break the prayer chain or else u know it is unfair to so and so.
come for this and this event, i mean imagine all your cell mates that would come too.
its always a case of dont do this and so and so may happen to you. its as if its a threat, or a way of making you feel bad. i know that all they are trying to inculcate is a sense of responsibility but it just does not work with me. i just feel so much more Free without all these "chains" attached. isnt being a christian freeing yourself from the chains of sin in the first place? why do i feel the other way round?
From fearing God im now afraid of him. what is this i say.... one thing for sure my mom does not support my stand and does not understand where i coming from. "oh im open to new things" yea right.... what a traditionalist i say. just because im not really for bush and she going "your not a christian!" like wth... and just by saying the word "infidel" she gets so hyped up about it and how it is such a taboo word used by the satanists or some ocult group. She will never accept the fact that there is such a thing as spiritual lethargy, by theory of - God stengthenth me. Ya ok mom i get it... but following something blindly is not him stengthening you, its masking yourself from him. spirited zombie i tell you... following his word blindly. And i dont want to become a spirited zombie, tho im a zombie myself without him.
posted by Frederick at
2:10 PM
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