banker suffered a fit today.... never seen him in such a terrible state before... your best loyal companion not being able to control his muscles, foaming at the mouth and gnashishing his teeth... i seriously thought he was gonna die. he was suffering so badly that he could not control his excrement. rolling around in his own spit and shit, it was not a sight that i was prepared to see, it tore me apart... it really did. the smell of it all. it still lingers at the back of my mind, almost touching my senses at this very moment, the closest i got to smell death's stench. for me, to know that he has always been by your side for the past decade and to see him in such a state. i dont want him to go. but sooner or later he has to eh...
we rushed him to the vet and put him on an IV drip and sedated him... collecting him tomorrow at noon, hope he's okay... i really do. i think the next fit maybe his last.
it feels awkward without him around in the house, no one to cuddle or someone to happily wait for you by your door when u wake up. i dread e days when it will all come true and forever be true. i had a nagging feeling last night that i should be spending more time with him, so i allowed him into my room and slept beside him. he didnt mind at all, and neither did i. for the first time in 14 years, he slept in my hand, literally... with my hand round his muzzle he fell asleep.
it has been a tough week, submissions, girlfriend left me and now what my companion's down? what could be coming next...
i dont know why she left me, i really dont. i guess she just got bored of me and well her reason is tt she cant handle a relationship now. okay fine i accept it, i just wished that she had come clean with me and faced me face to face and Talked things out, WHY, Because? and What is the Matter that is troubling you. it always can be worked out together... maybe she just chose e easier way out, to dump me altogether. to run solo and shut her doors to me.
ps - to you - all i wanted was for u to be there. you know how much banker means to me. im not saying physically but just be there. i know i maybe an arse sometimes and all but... please understand and please share about ur problems cos i wouldnt know if u didnt communicate with me.
random fact : anchovies suck.... tasted some of it.
we rushed him to the vet and put him on an IV drip and sedated him... collecting him tomorrow at noon, hope he's okay... i really do. i think the next fit maybe his last.
it feels awkward without him around in the house, no one to cuddle or someone to happily wait for you by your door when u wake up. i dread e days when it will all come true and forever be true. i had a nagging feeling last night that i should be spending more time with him, so i allowed him into my room and slept beside him. he didnt mind at all, and neither did i. for the first time in 14 years, he slept in my hand, literally... with my hand round his muzzle he fell asleep.
it has been a tough week, submissions, girlfriend left me and now what my companion's down? what could be coming next...
i dont know why she left me, i really dont. i guess she just got bored of me and well her reason is tt she cant handle a relationship now. okay fine i accept it, i just wished that she had come clean with me and faced me face to face and Talked things out, WHY, Because? and What is the Matter that is troubling you. it always can be worked out together... maybe she just chose e easier way out, to dump me altogether. to run solo and shut her doors to me.
ps - to you - all i wanted was for u to be there. you know how much banker means to me. im not saying physically but just be there. i know i maybe an arse sometimes and all but... please understand and please share about ur problems cos i wouldnt know if u didnt communicate with me.
random fact : anchovies suck.... tasted some of it.
posted by Frederick at
1:20 AM
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